Wednesday, 28 May 2014

It was the eve before boarding.

This week brings a flurry of "a year since" moments. 

Yesterday was a year since I took my last dance class with Mrs Boote and while the memory of that day makes tears spring up, yesterday was a wonderful day of new beginnings signing the contract and being welcomed into my new job. 

Today marks a year since our last day in PMB. To be honest, I can remember very little of it. It involved packing and weighing bags over and over again. It involved sorting through things. It involved many goodbyes and 'last times'. 

In the evening, we went with our homegroup to a restaurant for supper, not as a farewell or anything, but simply because it had been set aside as a social evening. I remember sitting at the table, listening to people talking about such mundane stuff, and feeling horribly alone with my thoughts, that nobody was really noticing what a huge night it was. 

Our last night in our country for a while. The next day we would board a plane and fly off to a city we were unfamiliar with, to live in an apartment we had no idea about, for Malcolm to learn German, while I had no idea what would become of my own dreams and ambitions. It was a brand new slate and we had next to no plan. It was exciting and daunting, and as much as I was trying very hard to be positive, it seemed more like an end to everything I knew and loved than an exciting new start. In some ways, I was looking forward to arriving in Germany because then finally the goodbyes and endings would be over and the new things would begin. Yet, at the same time, I dreaded landing in Germany because that would be just too real. 

I remember saying goodbye and going back to our flat, being a bundle of mixed emotions - nerves and fear and sadness and excitement and hope. 

We had absolutely no idea what to expect; not in regards to Cologne and perhaps even less regarding Marburg. All we knew was that God had opened doors and guided us and changed our hearts in so many ways, preparing us to take the step and go in His plan.
Last night we read the account of Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane and how he prayed to God that he wouldn't have to go through with the plan, but that it should not be his will, but God's that is done. At the end, he seems to have such peace, in such stark contrast to how he enters the garden.
It struck me how when we're in God's plan, he provides the peace and reassurance that we need, even if it's scary. 

Looking back, I can see God's faithfulness so clearly. We're blessed beyond what we imagined. We have seen God's goodness and provision over and over again. 
Today, while reflecting on this day a year ago, I'm so thankful. 


2 comments:

  1. it's always lovely to reflect on a year gone by and see all the blessings that surround us. i've loved following along as you adventure abroad, and i hope that the experience continues to inspire you :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Absolutely! And thank you, I hope so too :)

    ReplyDelete